a little about me and the blog to come

A word of warning: this blog isn't necessarily going to be about me. It'll just be a little of whatever thoughts are currently crawling through the muck of my brain wrinkles.
But in case you were interested -- and even in case you weren't...


My name is Dylan Holland. I'm from Kentucky (born and raised/FUCK INDIANA), but currently live in a podunk town in the middle of Nowhere, Japan. Supposedly, I teach English to Japanese middle schoolers, but in reality, I stand in the corner of a classroom parroting phrases from a woefully inadequate textbook and bemoan the state of English education in a country that only goes through the motions of feigning foreign language proficiency. Of course, I have little room to talk, as I have managed to learn less than a handful of dubiously useful Japanese words since coming here. I can find no reason why I should learn more. My term is coming to an end in early August, and while I can't wait to come home to Kentucky, I don't regret having the experience afforded to me by the JET program. Chief among them are the friends I have made here (fellow JETs all), and the varying amounts of hell I have raised on a regular basis with them. I will also, in my own way, miss the constant absurdity of this country, since looking to either side of you usually reveals somebody engaging in inexplicably weird behavior. In other words, it's ammunition out the asshole for writing essays and Twitter. You can't make this shit up.


In my free time I generally try to read and write, but I just usually end up dicking around on the internet, listening to music, playing games, and getting irrationally drunk. I figure that's generally what I'll end up writing about on this blog, and while I can't pretend I'm going to introduce you to the newest thing for hipsters to cream themselves over, or reveal any mind-shatteringly epic truths... I can promise to plumb the depths of the internet as far as I am personally willing to go in order to bring you meaningless shit you may not even want to bother reading.


I never said I wasn't a realist!



P.S. Here is a picture of a puppy. You're welcome.

could be a blog

I have decided that I could be doing a lot worse with my time than starting a blog, so here it is.

Since surviving the brutal Japanese winter for the first (and last) time, I could feel my creativity draining from me like so much oil from the ruptured underside of my piece of shit car (R.I.P.). I was no longer writing much of anything, despite the noble attempts our group of expat JET writers initially made. Truth is, after aborting my novel midway through November, I had barely written more than a page, and after being honest with myself, I felt I could no longer in good faith call myself even an amateur writer.
This blog is an attempt to fix that. Sure, I am plenty active on Twitter, but I can barely consider 147 character semi-witticisms to be a true test of creativity. A blog will offer something in a longer format, tempered by the internet's ability to render anything I say less meaningful. I figure it'll allow me to take what I'm saying less seriously, while diving back into extended writing.
Here goes nothing.